After The Breakup, Your Options Are Limited

If you find yourself on the receiving end of a breakup, you know how hard it can be to change the situation. In fact, if you’ve been dumped, you have very little in the way of options. You are at a very significant disadvantage psychologically in the post breakup relationship.

Not having any viable options can really take its toll on a person. Quite often, it will cause someone to take drastic measures even though they know they are doomed to failure. Furthermore, these actions may permanently kill any chances you have for a reconciliation in the future.

Such behavior is often described as erratic, desperate, needy, and pitiful. It includes such things as phoning your ex dozens of times per day, texting them consistently, and may include the odd desperate e-mail. None of this is going to change your ex’s mind, but it will show them that you are not exactly the person they thought you were. A bad situation all around.

Now, just because you are on the defensive, doesn’t mean that you can’t make decisions for yourself and improve your situation. For one thing, you don’t have to contact your ex at all. Secondly, you can easily remove yourself from the volatile environment and take some time for yourself. Go on vacation, go visit friends, whatever it takes; just don’t contact your ex for any reason.

Of course, this is easier said than done. Though we may know the mistakes we’re making, oftentimes our emotions can do our thinking for us. The end result is that you put yourself in the position where you are nothing more than a nuisance and a pest in your ex’s eyes.

The first step towards turning the psychological tables on your ex is acknowledging the fact that you have very few options and you are at a significant disadvantage. The second thing you need to do is tell yourself that it’s only a temporary situation. Third, make yourself scarce and get on with your life.

Amazingly, if you’re able to do this, you’ll notice a few things happening: First of all, you will start feeling your confidence and self-esteem returning – Secondly, you will create an environment in which your ex will start thinking about you. What you have done is created scarcity and it’s simple human nature to want what we can’t have. If your ex has any feelings for you at all, you’re going to be on their mind quite a bit from here on out.

That’s how you change the psychological tables in your favor. in fact, it really is the only way.