If you are reading this, there is a good chance that you are going through a tough time at the moment dealing with a breakup. It probably feels like you’re never going to be the same again and that the only person you ever loved (and will ever love) is gone from your life for good. At times like this, you may even be obsessed with your former partner. The only thoughts you may have at the moment involve ways to get your ex back and nothing more. The concept of a life after this relationship seems surreal. You can’t get your head around the fact that your ex may be gone for good.
Any advice you are being given at the moment will no doubt include the fact that some day you will be completely over all this and will look back on it with mild amusement at best. While it’s true that time will heal even the worst situations, it is of little consolation here and now. At this point in time, you don’t even want to consider what your life will be like when you are over your ex because when that happens it will mean that your ex, the love of your life, will be gone and nothing but a distant, though fond, memory.
How depressing is that? You are searching desperately and wondering how to get your ex back, and they are telling you that you’ll get over it – nope, that just isn’t going to work.
Of course, it’s easy for any one of your friends or family members to dole out these nuggets of wisdom because they don’t have to deal with the incredible heart-ache and despair you are feeling at the moment. This is real and there is no denying that.
The good news is that you don’t have to settle for the promise that things will be better in time. How much time are we talking about anyway? A month? A year? And just imagine having to endure that hardship knowing that some day the pain will subside.
Don’t get me wrong: of course, the pain will eventually subside and you will recover, but it definitely will not be an easy road.
So if you are not willing to let go of your ex, the time to act is now. You need to put a plan together and follow it through. I’m not saying that you should start harassing your ex (we know that doesn’t work anyway), but you should at least put something in place in terms of a short and long term plan.
And do not hesitate – the clock is ticking and your window of opportunity is closing.
Need a place to start? Try thinking about the mistakes you are making at this very minute when it comes to dealing with your ex. Are you harassing him/her with phone calls and text messages? Maybe it’s the fact that you are unwilling to take no for an answer until things cool off. Whatever mistakes you are making at the moment, you know deep down what they are.
The next step is easy: if you know the mistakes you are making, then simply do the opposite. Can’t stop contacting your ex? Simple, just keep away. Enlist the help of some good friends if necessary. If you really can’t keep away, take a trip out of town and go on vacation for a bit. Make sure the cell phone stays at home. Once you have identified the problem, the solution is usually straight forward.